More Hillary Stuff

Everyone can use a little humor. Good-natured jokes and stories can brighten a day and go well with that first cup of coffee. (Let's keep'em clean)

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Emery
Posts: 2386
Joined: Sun Jul 28, 2002 1:02 am
Location: Owensville, MO
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More Hillary Stuff

Post by Emery »

Hillary Clinton said that her childhood dream was to be an Olympic athlete.
But she was not athletic enough. She said she wanted to be an astronaut, but at the time they didn't take women. She said she wanted to go into medicine, but hospitals made her woozy. Should she be telling people this story? I mean she's basically saying she wants to be president because *she can't do anything else."*
--Jay Leno

"Well, the big story -- Hillary Clinton will be running for
president in 2008. You know why I think she's running? I think she finally
wants to see *what it's like to sleep in the president's bed."*
--Jay Leno

"Top Democrats have mixed feelings about Senator Hillary Clinton
running for president. Apparently, some Democrats don't like the idea, while
others hate it."
--Conan O'Brien

"Former President Bill Clinton said that if his wife, Hillary, is
elected president, he will do whatever she wants. You know Bill Clinton --
when he makes a vow to Hillary, you can take that to the bank."
--Jay Leno

A student from the University of Washington has sold his soul on
eBay for $400. He's a law student, so he probably doesn't need it, but
still, that's not very much. Today, Hillary Clinton said, 'Hey, at least I
got some furniture and a Senate seat for mine."
-Jay Leno

"Hillary Clinton said today that she wants legislation to allow all
ex-felons to vote. See, this way all the Clinton's former business partners
can vote for her in 2008."
--Jay Leno

Hillary Clinton's 506-page memoirs have come out. So much of her
personality shines through, that in the end, you, too, will want to sleep
with an intern."
-- Craig Kilborn
In Hillary Clinton's new book 'Living History,' Hillary details
what it was like meeting Bill Clinton, falling in love with him, getting
married, and living a passionate, wonderful life as husband and wife. Then
on page two, the trouble starts."
-- Jay Leno

"In the book, she says when Bill told her he was having an affair
she said "I could hardly breathe, I was gulping for air. No, I'm sorry,
that's what Monica said."
-- David Letterman

"Hillary Clinton, our junior senator from New York, announced that
she has no intentions of ever, ever running for office of the President of
the United States. Her husband, Bill Clinton, is bitterly disappointed. He
is crushed. There go his dreams of becoming a two-impeachment family."
-- David Letterman

"Last night, Senator Hillary Clinton hosted her first party in her
new home in Washington. People said it was a lot like the parties she used
to host at the White House. In fact, even the furniture was the same."
-- Jay Leno


"CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in America. Women admire her because she's strong and successful. Men admire her because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with it."
-- Jay Leno

"Hillary Clinton is the junior senator from the great state of New
York. When they swore her in, she used the Clinton family Bible....the one
with only seven commandments."
- -David Letterman
Be ye kind one unto another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you. Ephesians 4:32

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MasonsBeagles
Posts: 2214
Joined: Fri Jun 20, 2003 2:39 pm
Location: Louisville Kentucky
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Re: More Hillary Stuff

Post by MasonsBeagles »

Thats FUnny right there, I dont care who you are.
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